One of my favourite things about Steven, about our entire relationship infact, is the way that we don’t prescribe to the classic couple tropes. He listens to me, we both do our fair share around the house (infact, there’s a chance that he often does more…!) and I don’t have to spend Friday nights with wine and gal pals whinging about him. It’s pretty great.
One thing I have noticed, is the amount of people, whether they know Steven or not, just assume that he would have no interest in helping plan the wedding. At wedding fairs it is assumed that he’s been dragged along (which would be difficult as he’s the one who does all the driving) and even in general conversations, he gets left out.
I’d like to think, considering it was Steven’s idea to get married, that he’s pretty into the whole thing. He has spent hours listening to me going through my various Pinterest boards (yep, I have more than one for the wedding!), and letting me know which ideas he loves, and which he doesn’t fancy. He helped me with picking bridesmaids and was just as in-love with the venue as I am. If anyone starts asking about the wedding, instead of just leaving me to gush away, he joins in too.
He’s excited about this wedding too!
As much of a control freak as I may be, I just couldn’t plan a wedding with someone who thought their only input was to show up on the day. Don’t get me wrong, that works for some people just fine, and as with anything wedding related, you do you! But it’s just not my thing. Neither is it Steven’s. We’re a partnership, a team.
There are some things that are entirely in my hands. No matter how much I try to persuade him, he will not help me find a wedding dress. He is 90% in charge of finding a photographer as, being a photographer himself, he knows what we should be looking for. We are having a few different flavoured layers of cake, as Steven is a huge fruitcake fan (the jokes are far too easy to make here!), and I prefer a good lemon cake so we are compromising by having both.
Some men aren’t going to be big into the planning of a wedding, and neither are some women. I guess the message here, isn’t to assume either way. But for goodness sake, someone please speak to Steven about the wedding - his excitement is wonderful!